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Woman Says 'I'm Not A Morning Person' But Wakes Up At 5 AM On Weekends For 'Me Time'

Woman Says 'I'm Not A Morning Person' But Wakes Up At 5 AM On Weekends For 'Me Time'
The 'me time' is watching TV and resenting anyone who texts before 10 AM.

Amanda Contradiction sleeps through her 9 AM meetings but rises at dawn on weekends. 'It's different,' Amanda explained. 'Weekend mornings are sacred. Work mornings are violence.' She has called in sick due to 'exhaustion' after a weekend of 'aggressive relaxation.' Her boss is 'confused but afraid to ask.' Amanda's alarm clock has two settings: 'off' for weekdays, 'aggressive' for 'protecting my peace.'

📅 1 day ago ⏱️ 66s read #Sleep#Productivity#Satire
⚠️ Satirical Content Disclaimer:
This article is a work of satire and parody. It is entirely fictional and created for entertainment purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. Do not interpret this as factual news or accurate reporting.