Soccer Team Wins Championship Using Only Headers, Referees Don't Know What To Do

In a tactical revolution that has left soccer purists weeping, the newly formed 'HeadButt United' soccer team has won the regional championship using exclusively headers to control and advance the ball. The team, which trained for 6 months in headball techniques, never uses feet, kicks the ball only to head it, and has developed what they call 'cranial dribbling' as a legitimate skill. Referees are baffled because technically nothing in the rulebook prohibits using your head exclusively, but it feels 'deeply wrong.' The opposing team filed a formal complaint saying, 'This isn't soccer, it's headball,' to which HeadButt United's captain replied, 'It's soccer with commitment.' The FIFA is now reviewing whether to create a new sport called 'Headball' to accommodate this innovation, or to simply ban the team for 'being too good at heads.'