New Alarm Clock App Only Works If You Solve A Math Problem, Users Report Higher Math Scores But Less Sleep

A new app called 'Wake Up Smarter' has been designed by sadists masquerading as educational innovators: it requires users to solve complex math problems to turn off the alarm. The app, which has been downloaded 5 million times by people who hate themselves in the morning, features problems ranging from algebra to calculus. Users report taking an average of 47 minutes to solve the problems, meaning their alarms go off at 6 AM and they finally silence them at 6:47 AM. One user said, 'I used to be bad at math, now I'm getting A's in calculus, but I'm also chronically sleep-deprived and my relationships are suffering.' The app has a 4.7-star rating because people 'feel smarter' even though they're 'exhausted.' A premium version offers easier math but charges $47 per month.