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Guy's 'I'm A Nice Guy' Speech Lasted 47 Minutes, Included A Pie Chart Of His Kindness Metrics

Guy's 'I'm A Nice Guy' Speech Lasted 47 Minutes, Included A Pie Chart Of His Kindness Metrics
The pie chart had a slice labeled 'times I opened a door' and 'times I didn't complain.'

Trevor NiceGuy sat his situationship down for a 47-minute presentation on why he's 'a good person.' The presentation included spreadsheets, testimonials from his mom, and a pie chart of his 'kindness distribution.' 'I deserve a chance,' Trevor concluded. She left mid-chart. The pie chart now hangs in her apartment with the caption 'proof that niceness cannot be graphed.' Trevor is now 'focusing on himself' which he announced on LinkedIn.

📅 2 days ago ⏱️ 70s read #Dating#Nice Guy#Comedy
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This article is a work of satire and parody. It is entirely fictional and created for entertainment purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. Do not interpret this as factual news or accurate reporting.