Grumpy McSnorepants Declares Mondays 'Illegal,' Tuesdays 'Probationary'
Wednesday is now the new Monday, which defeats the entire purpose.
Grumpy McSnorepants, the self-appointed 'King of Weekdays,' has declared Mondays illegal and Tuesdays 'on probation.' 'From now on, the week starts on Wednesday,' McSnorepants announced from his bed. 'But then Wednesday becomes Monday,' a reporter pointed out. McSnorepants paused. 'Then we'll make Monday illegal again.' The new calendar has confused everyone, and most people have just decided to stay in bed indefinitely, which was apparently the goal all along.